Four Monthiversary

It is four months today since we took physical custody of Reese and Jessenia.  And what an awesome four months it has been. 
So this is my four months in review.
Month 1:  Honeymoon Phase
It was all so new and exciting.  We were nervous.  We had no idea what we were doing.  They were adorable.  We loved them.  They were still learning the ropes and responded to direction pretty well.  This month went by way too fast.
Month 2:  Survival Mode
I just wanted to make it to the end of the day with everyone being alive.  Mack was incredibly busy at school and I felt like I was in the trenches day in and day out.  The honeymoon phase was over and there was a lot of crying around our house (a majority of it from me).  The kids were testing new boundaries and I was learning how to discipline.  Mack assures me that he doesn't remember anything from when he was two and three so I am hopeful that my kids will not hold me responsible for all of the mistakes I made during this month.
Month 3:  Frustration
This was the month where I said in my head repeatedly, "Now I know why people don't adopt sibling groups".  Getting two kids at the same time is HARD.  And two kids who have lived in multiple homes with multiple expectations before they came into your family is SUPER HARD.  It was an emotional month.  I love my kids but there were definately moments where they pushed me to my emotional and mental breaking point.  It truly was an accomplishment some days that I didn't run away from home from being so frustrated.  Frustrated that they couldn't fall asleep in the same room because they would keep each other awake until 10:30.  Frustrated that they would cry for thirty minutes every time they got a timeout.  Frustrated that the crying was usually mixed with high pitched screaming that woke up Brisbane and disrupted all of our lives.  I cried a lot this month, even more than Survival Mode Month.
Month 4:  I Love My Job
I love being a mom.  I have new perspective.  I don't know that much has changed with all of the things that used to frustrate me, but now it just doesn't matter.  Sure, the kids can still grate on my nerves but that is usually just small mundane things.  My perspective and ability to cope with my life is what has changed, not the kids.
Back in the Honeymoon Phase I remember telling people that I had the best job in the world.  I lost that glow somewhere in trying to survive and feeling totally inadequate as a mother, wife, and homemaker.  But it's back.  We have a new lease on life and fun around our house.  Mack is still crazy busy studying for boards but I am now enjoying the time until he comes home instead of counting down the minutes and whining. 
Motherhood is really hard.  I have given my mother far too little credit over the years for being such an amazing Mom.  And even though we still have hard moments.  They really are just moments.  They don't control our day and they certainly don't control our lives. 
I can't believe that it has already been four months.  And at the same time I can't believe that it has only been four months.  I suppose that is the beauty of knowing your kids will be yours eternally.  I wouldn't have it any other way and certainly not with any other kids.